Reader Catherine Platt has asked me to share the following story, in case it may provide some encouragement to others in a similar situation...
‘One is one and all alone’ – so the nursery rhyme goes –
A Family History journey spanning 20 years!
At the time I retired in 2004, I knew only the story my mother Barbara Tough maintained, that my father (a sailor) had died during the war, her parents had died and she had no brothers or sisters. In contrast both sides of my husband John Platt’s family were teeming with aunts, uncles, cousins galore… many still living within 10 miles of their birth place.
The facts I had were my mother, Barbara left Aberdeen, Scotland with me as a 2/3 year old and took a housekeeper’s job in Leeds for about two years. Then we moved another 4 times, then around 1951 she and I settled in Knutsford Cheshire until her death in 1979.
Not believing the ‘no relatives’ tale, I set out to research what I thought was a very unusual surname, Tough. The Aberdeen FH society were holding a FH day at Kings University, so we travelled up there for this seminar. There they told me Tough (pronounced Tuach) was a very common local name. So began my search, using parish register entries on microfiche of the area where I knew mother was brought up – Bridge of Don, the parish of Old Machar. It was on an old map of the area I spotted the name Morrison’s Croft, and this was written as her place of birth on her birth certificate. One asset the Aberdeen Family History society had was a library of past researcher’s family studies. I started reading through the studies in the Tough section (many written by Americans and Canadians). It was on reading probably the 5th or 6th of these files, I began recognising names and places mentioned and knew I’d found the right Tough family. I phoned John Tough, the author of this file and following some hasty arrangements, met John, his uncle Bob and aunt Betty in Aberdeen. He remembered my mother, his aunty Barbara and told me the family often mused ‘whatever happened to aunty Barbara and her bairn’. On subsequent visits I learned more and met 4 other cousins
Next decade 2024, I started a search for paternal ties via wartime naval personnel information. Then I took a DNA test. Shocking results, as I discovered I was 50% Norwegian. So I’d been searching for records of Jack, the sailor in the wrong country. I finally looked at two old books of my mother’s about old Norway, and saw an inscription with the signature Jack Stendal. My focus now was on the Norwegian archive office. They responded with information on a Jacob Andreas Stendal (b.1.9.1905). His military record showed he was in the UK from 1941 on 3 different warships, plus Portsmouth during the war years. The Oslo archive also enclosed 2 newspaper clippings concerning Jacob, plus a mention of a biography published in 2020. This proved he had survived the war.
A Google search of Jacob Andreas Stendal, showed there was the biography ('From war to a peaceful life' - roughly translated title) written by Emse Andreas Lote. This book was not freely available anywhere other than in academic libraries. An Oslo University Library assistant alerted me to Norwegian Yellow Pages, and at last I had contact details I could follow up! First step was a Christmas card, enquiring to buy a copy of the book. Then an exchange of emails, as she was puzzled to know why I was interested in this Norwegian text book about Jacob, but she sent an extract of an incident involving Jacob and his fellow recuperating naval officers who had been invited to go fox-hunting with the Grantham Hunt (he fell off his horse). My follow up email, pressing to buy the book, was queried, so I said I suspected we could be related. A video call was arranged, and after some questions, Emse agreed to do a DNA test and said, ‘whatever the truth/result will be, my face shape was unmistakenly ‘Norwegian’, and so this fact convinced her that I had a Norwegian parent. She agreed to send me her book, and in exchange I would arrange to send her the DNA testing equipment. Meanwhile I grew fairly proficient in using the on-line translation software and managed to print out an English version of Emse’s 197 page book, outlining not only Jacob’s SOE exploits during his years in UK, but his life story, post-war in setting up a youth sailing proficiency school (for which he received the King’s Medal).
Shortly after my 80th birthday, she contacted me saying ‘Hi sister’… we were a match! On 9 April 2025 she emailed confirming I now had 2 half-sisters (one in the US, but both with English speaking husbands) 4 nephews, 1 niece, 4 grand nephews, plus many more wider family members, so 20 Norwegian nationals. Thus these relatives, added to the Scots Tough clan (16 or so estimated), plus my husband’s extensive family, revealing that I’m now part of a sizeable tribe.
Seizing the moment, with my daughter, I travelled to Oslo last August and met Emse, and several of her family. I was shown Oslo harbour, where my father was initially harbour master, following the German invasion, the town where he grew up, and his gravestone. The Lote family are planning to visit us in Lincoln in July, but dates are pending medical checks.
The results of my family history research was a case of ‘just in time’ for people in their 80s.
Catherine Platt
(PIC: Cathy with Emse, author of Fra Krig til Sjovett, and Alan her husband, in Munch Museum, overlooking Oslo Harbour)
** If you have a story you would like to share, to help others with their research, by all means drop me a note, I'll be only too happy to publish it!
(With thanks to Cathy)
Chris
Order Researching Ancestral Crisis in Ireland in the UK at https://bit.ly/4jJWSEh. Also available -Tracing Your Belfast Ancestors, Tracing Your Irish Ancestors Through Land Records, Sharing Your Family History Online, Tracing Your Scottish Family History on the Internet, Tracing Your Irish Family History on the Internet (2nd ed), and Tracing Your Scottish Ancestry Through Church and State Records - to purchase, please visit https://bit.ly/ChrisPatonPSbooks. To purchase in the USA visit https://www.penandswordbooks.com. Further news published daily on The Scottish GENES Facebook page.

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